Mirty tagged me for this. I’ve never done one before but it seems like fun, so…

1. Seven celebrity crushes. I don’t think I’ve ever had one. Maybe hundreds of years ago before the dawn of remembering (which starts about yesterday, nowadays) which only the annals of time can still recall. Sorry about that. But if anyone is considering a celebrity crush and looking for inspiration, I would just say, avoid Tom Cruise.

2. Seven things I can do. Play the piano, obviously. Folk fiddling, occasionally. Most of the arty things one does with words, if relevant, which is not very often. Feel at home almost anywhere in the world except England (semi-excepting London). Kill pot plants just by looking at them. Appreciate and find a persuasive moral message in any obscure film you care to mention. Keep coming up with new ideas for world dominion, whether or not they ever lead to anything.

3. Seven things I can’t do. Swim, scuba-dive, water-ski, drive a car, understand Hebrew, open a bottle of fizzy wine (that’s a Man Job, surely?), car maintenance.

4. Seven things that attract me to the opposite sex. (It has to be all of these together, not just one): being called Shadrach, living in my house, being married to me, making the espresso machine work against all odds, wearing the worst slippers in the world (they are not “lumberjack slippers” they are Grandpa Slippers), making me coffee in the mornings even including all my Required Coffee Rituals (milk whisk thingy, chocolate powder shaker thingy etc), claiming to enjoy my piano-playing.

5. Seven things that I say most often. “I don’t know what to do,” not from desperation, just from lack of a structured daytime routine (So far). Can’t think of any more.

6. Seven things I plan to do before I die. Meet a lot more people. Throw huge parties. Be an International Artist. Become an Internet Millionaire. Buy a house, one of these new trendy corrugated metal and breeze-block ones that are popping up round here lately. Live in New York City (part-time). Make a movie called “The Austin Gay Acapella Singers”.

7. Seven people I am tagging for this. Uh, I think it’s been around for a while and everyone has done it already. But just in case not: Jen, Maria, Natalie, gcotharn, uh, I can’t think of anybody else. This is why all that meeting people and throwing huge parties is still in the “before I die” category. If anyone wants to volunteer to be tagged by me, I will add them to the list.